The Well Cultured Anonymous

Key Things that Turn Women On


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Key Things that Turn Women On

  • Adventure- Being adventurous. That's why it's best, even on dating sites, to take pictures of yourself doing high adventure shit- even hiking or biking or something.

  • Exclusivity- Women tend to like guys who are hard to get, or at least play that guy. That's why women fantasize about marrying princes. Make yourself exclusive, and the desire grows.

  • Humor- Most chicks like to laugh. Being un-funny or overly stupid makes them feel bored. Be real and be cool, just don't try to be a Jim Carrey ripoff.

  • Money- Yes, I'm serious- women tend to like guys who have money. Part of it is because of the goodies that come with it- but much like the "Safety" point below, they also find it reassuring that you aren't poor and you could support them. Like you would.

  • Mystery- Being mysterious is a big plus, as evidenced by the majority of Yaoi shit on the internet nowadays. Play this with being standoffish (see "Exclusivity")- leave some things unsaid.

  • Romance- The sheer chemistry of being together. This just means heating things up a bit- and I'm sure you'd want to get to this point anyway.

  • Safety- Much like money, women do not attach to men who's futures involve "working at a coal mill". If you appear secure in your future and look like you have some cash on hand, they will be more likely to trust you.

  • Testosterone- Show the manliness you have a bit. Get angry sometimes. Don't get pushed around. Have some muscles. Even though girls say they want a "nice" guy, they get wetter faster for someone who is willing to prove they have a penis. That's why a lot of "jerks" are more likely to get laid than a "nice guy".

Seduction Techniques

Playing a Part

Believe it or not, being stereotypical can be good, because it makes you easier to swallow for most girls. Let's be honest here- if you walked into any given social situation acting like Hunter Thompson, it would no doubt be awesome, but the majority of women would be off put. This is because, much like your average guy, they look for personality types they can understand and accept. It applies to guys too- you're looking for generally acceptable girls- so this should not be TOO MUCH of a surprise for you.

So, with all of that in mind, here are your generally accepted personality types:

  • The Bad Boy

Tattoos, high adventure, and badassery. If you're like this, you can be pushier and expect more sex- but she's likely to use you as a fling more than anything.

  • The Artist

Emo, faggotry, creative, and the like. This is best for skinny and artistic guys, but you have to sacrifice your testosterone. However, sex also comes easy.

  • The Cool Rich Man

Money, power, and stability. This requires that you're something of a good looker with cash, and that you have a high status in society, as well as a relaxed and good personality. Sex comes easy, but you may pick up too many gold diggers.

  • The Lover

The kind of people you see in romance novels for overweight married women. This requires the utmost of seduction and good looks, and gets you loads of sex. However, much like the bad boy, this doesn't translate into an actual relationship, and you'll tend to pick up "too" desperate women.

  • The Greenpeace Fuck

Believe it or not, there are a lot of wet (anorexic) pussies in the ultra-green world. Sound concerned about the environment and about how the "evil right wants to stop the little man" and girls tend to like you. But only greenpeace-esque girls- this isn't really something to play at a bar.

  • The Foreign Guy

Look foreign? Play it up and pick up some women with a taste in the wild side. These tend to be one night stands, though, and it's hard to pretend for very long.

  • The Frat Fuck

This is when you are unoriginal and stupid, and you have no talent. Generally, your average frat fuck will get laid, but only to desperate or slutty girls. This is to only be used in absolute desperation.

Types to Avoid

  • The Potential Husband

The potential husband is someone who NEVER gets laid and generally gets pulled around on a leash, a kind of support for a girl who feels her biological clock ticking. Basically, she's going to go fuck everyone but you, then use you as her husband when she's not feeling wild anymore. If this happens, just tell her to put out or get out.

  • The Good Friend

The good friend is someone who is used as emotional support, not romance. This kind of stereotype is fine if you actually just want to be friends, but it's romantic suicide (you're basically put on the wrong ladder, as explained below).

A woman has a close male friend. This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend. This always starts out with, you're a great guy, but I don't like you in that way. This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying, You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we're not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But, we're going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn't work out, we'll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you. But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person that we hired.

  • The Fat Funny Guy

Are you overweight? Do you wear Hawaiian shirts? Do you joke with people a lot? Do you secretly lust for girls skinnier than you? Give up.

Being Self-Confident, not an Arrogant Asshole

Arrogance is good. In fact, arrogance is part of being a guy. When you start talking to a girl, your ability to seem self-confident and powerful is a turn on to them, because it shows them that you are "complete". Saying "I'm not sure of myself" or any variation thereof is the quickest way to becoming "a good friend"- something you don't want. Because of this, you need to remember that as kind as you may be, you need to be masculine.

Let's take a classic example: James Bond. Women get all wet for James Bond. But if you watch the movies, he is actually quite misogynistic- to the point of being sexually harassing. The thing about James Bond is that he doesn't really fuck around with women, nor does he ask them questions- he just does. I'm certainly not saying to run off and force yourself upon the closest girl to you- but girls don't want someone who is wishy-washy or uncertain. They want to be swept off their feet.

So, for all real purposes, stop hesitating and using excessive deference when speaking. "Um", "Uhhh", and "Well" is completely out. Try to avoid terms like "should" or "maybe"- try to be more definite. This isn't to say you should be crude or too blunt- just be more strong.

Also, try to be a bit more polite. This comes out of left field in this way, but it's a bitching way to show them that you also care. Or something. Long story short: If you say "Thank you" or "Ma'am" or whatever, you tend to look much more refined- but still retain that masculine edge. A good thing.

The Relationship Ladder

Congrats, you're on the first rung of the relationship ladder, in short provided you aren't a complete fuckwit, you're in there. All it takes is for some ingenuity, and to not care if it doesn't work out (if it doesn't work out, likely as not, you'll not be in her good books for, well eternity). Let me explain, when women mean men, they assess them for suitability, and if you're know this from stage one, you can act such that you want to find yourself bullock-deep in her nether regions, without overstepping the boundaries of what is considered good etiquette. Rule of thumb, until you know she won't get bitchy, use words, not hands/actions, you grab her ass when you first meet her, and you're fucked, and not the good sort. Slightly different rules apply if you're in a club (note, you might have heard of these, its where people who aren't social fuckwits go on a Friday night). Should you find yourself in such a place different rules apply, but you're not after a relationship in a club, just a quick shag. should you feel the need to grab an arse in a club, make sure the owner is alone, i.e. not currently engaged in pulling someone, and not a total boar. When talking to the girl when you first meet her, you basically want to follow the advice elsewhere, be nice, but also show an arrogant flair, with a dash of testosterone. Hopefully, when the time comes, and you have to wrap up the conversation, you can ask her for her number, msn doodad, faggotspace, faggotbook, faggotjournal or whatever method of contacting her (writing a letter is far too old-fashioned, you will be laughed at, and you're back to square 1).

Oh, and for the love of furry, FIND OUT HER FUCKING NAME, With out that, you are screwed, beyond belief, and the type that involves you not getting any.

The Friend Ladder

Somebody fucked up. Probably you. If sex was the desired goal, this is not the ladder to be on, unfortunately, the only way to test the water, i.e. find out where you dwell, is to dip an extremity in. you can do this by either asking, would you ever date me, or, get someone who knows you both to ask her. if you find out you reside on this atrocity, you are buggered, and you need to stop being so friendly, and when you have left your object of desire be for a while, (over 9000 hours, with less contact than usual, should do it).

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