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WARNING! WARNING! WARNING!

If you are a person of taste and refinement, PUT THIS BOOK DOWN NOW! The songs, toasts, poems, and jokes contained herein have flunked every test of decency and sensitivity known to mankind. This songbook is profoundly offensive--but then, so are hashers, and they are the audience for whom Hash Hymns is intended.

This collection was made possible by the efforts of Hash House Harriers around the world who freely shared their favorite songs with me. In turn, please feel free to copy and share anything in this songbook.

Hash Hymns is a work in progress, constantly growing. When I started this collection I knew about 100 songs; this edition contains more than 500. If you know songs you don't see here, please send them to me for inclusion in future editions. I'll be happy to give you credit. My address is in the back.

Now for the Oscar acceptance speech: Hash Hymns is dedicated to Hash House Harriers everywhere, especially my friends of the Tampa, Other Orlando, Phoenix, Okinawa, Hong Kong (Little Sai Wan, Hong Kong, and Southside), Bangkok (Saturday and Monday), Darwin, Orange County, Long Beach, Osan Bulgogi, Seoul, Tacoma, Puget Sound, Singapore (Lion City), San Diego, Fog City, East Bay-Mt. Diablo, San Francisco, Gypsies in the Palace, Honolulu, Aloha, Hilo, Hawaii Full Moon, Albuquerque, South Bay/Agnews State, San Diego Anal Retentive, Sacramento, and Las Vegas Resur-Erection Hash House Harriers. More thanks are due to the infamous Hammersley Hash, the North Shore Hussies (Auckland), and Rotorua Hashes, our hosts at InterHash 1994 in New Zealand. Special thanks also to ZiPpy, Bollox, Beaver Bam Bam Balls, Ian Cumming, Sauer Krotch, Dum B.U.F, Mu-Sick, Neptunus, Sodbuster, and two non-hashers: Derek Cashman and Ed Cray. Finally, thanks to the pilots of the US and NATO fighter squadrons in the Second Allied Tactical Air Force who started me singing and taught me the basics. Without their inspiration this songbook wouldn't exist. Thank you, thank you (someone get the hook!) . . .

Note to Song Masters: Hashers like to sing, but not many like buying songbooks just so they can learn new tunes. And even if they do, they forget to bring their songbooks to the hash. As a song master, I've had better luck copying one or two numbers from this collection every time we hash, then handing out copies at the circle. It's a great strategy to get people singing, and probably the best way to use this songbook.
On-On!
Flying Booger

Former GM, Okinawa H3, Aloha H3, Hawaii Full Moon H3

Song Master at Large

Las Vegas, Nevada


DISCLAIMER

The material contained in this songbook does not necessarily reflect the thoughts or opinions of the author, his employer, or humanity at large; Copyright © 1995 FlyBoog Enterprises Inc.; all rights reserved; Hash Hymns is distribution copyrighted to the extent that you may distribute it and all its associated parts freely but you may not make a profit from it or include the songbook or parts thereof in commercial publications; further redistributions of this songbook are only allowed unedited and in its entirety via anonymous FTP, electronic transmissions, storage media, or printed copy as long as this notice is included and no monetary fee is charged; contents are subject to change without notice; contents slightly enlarged to show detail; resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is unintentional and coincidental; use of the masculine pronoun is intended to include both genders where appropriate; hand wash only, drip dry; do not bend, fold, mutilate, or spindle; singing in falsetto prohibited where banned; anchovies or jalapeños added upon request; your mileage may vary; no substitutions allowed; for a limited time only; quantities limited while supplies last; this offer void where prohibited; songs provided "as is" without any warranties expressed or implied; user assumes full liabilities; not liable for damages due to use or misuse; FlyBoog Enterprises Inc. is an equal opportunity song collector; no shoes, no shirt, no songs; don't pee in my songbook and I won't sing in your bathroom; tee many martoonies; caveat emptor; sing at your own risk; parental advisory: explicit lyrics; text contains material some readers may find objectionable; adult themes; keep away from pets and small children; limit one-per-family please; no money down; no purchase necessary; you need not be present to win; some assembly required; batteries not included; action figures sold separately; no preservatives added; contents may have settled during mailing; sealed for your protection, do not use if safety seal is broken; refrigerate after opening; safety goggles required during use; call before you dig; use only with proper ventilation; for external use only; if a rash, redness, irritation, or swelling develops, discontinue singing; immediately flush mouth with soap and running water; if ingested, induce vomiting; if symptoms persist, consult a songmeister; avoid extreme temperatures and store in a cool dry place; keep away from open flames; do not place near flammable or magnetic source; avoid inhaling fumes or contact with mucous membranes; smoking contents may be hazardous to your health; song text made from 100% recycled electrons and magnetic particles; no animals or live hashers were used to test the offensiveness of these songs; no salt, MSG, artificial color or flavor added; songs are ribbed for your pleasure but sold for the purpose of disease prevention only; the best safeguard, second only to abstinence, is a good laugh; slippery when wet; must be 18 to enter; possible penalties for early withdrawal; one size fits all; offer valid only at participating sites; slightly higher west of the Rockies; state and local taxes may apply; allow four to six weeks for delivery; if defects are discovered, do not try to fix them yourself, but return to an authorized song service center; this disclaimer does not cover tornado, flood, hurricane, lightning, earthquake, and other Acts of God, misuse, neglect, unauthorized repair, damage from improper scoring, typos, misspelled words, incorrect line voltage, missing or altered verses, sonic boom vibrations, off-key notes, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, customer adjustments that are not covered in the song instructions, and incidents owing to motor vehicle accidents, ship sinkings, airplane crashes, accidental file deletions, projectiles, or failure to carry the tune; other restrictions may apply; no poofters. If the contents offend you, lighten up, get a life, and move on. Send product comments to FlyBoog Inc. at .

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